If Men Were To Rewrite The Rules
Rule # 1:
Anything we said six or eight months ago is inadmissible in an
argument. All comments become null and void after seven days.
Rule # 2:
If you don't want to dress like Victoria's Secret girls, don't
expect us to act like soap opera guys.
Rule # 3:
If we say something that can be interpreted in two ways, and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other way.
Rule # 4:
It is in neither your best interest or ours to make us take those
stupid Cosmo quizzes together.
Rule # 5:
Let us ogle. If we don't look at other women how can we know how
pretty you are?
Rule # 6:
Don't rub the lamp if you don't want the genie to come out.
Rule # 7:
You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it
done - not both.
Rule # 8:
Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials or time-outs.
Rule # 9:
Christopher Columbus didn't need directions and neither do we.
Rule # 10:
Women who wear Wonderbras and low-cut blouses lose their right to
complain about having their boobs stared at.
Rule # 11:
When we're turning the wheel and the car is nosing onto the off
ramp, you saying "This is our exit" is not necessary.
Rule # 12:
Don't fake it. We'd rather be ineffective than deceived.